Maybe

Sometimes, I wonder how my life would have turned out if I had done some things differently. This question bothers me sometimes. What would my life be like if I had done something so insignificant at the time, like say, stay 5 minutes longer in school, or even walk a different path to someplace. Perhaps I'd have the same life, perhaps not. Perhaps I'd be a completely different person. Perhaps I'd have better grades. Perhaps I'd have more friends.

So many possibilities, and yet this is my life now. I can't go back to choose different choices. And if I could, I might even do the same things. At least I know what their outcomes are because I've lived through them.

I'd like to think I'm contented with my life, but it could be better. It could always be better no matter how good life gets. In a way, life has no limits. Only the person sets his own limits. Perhaps, I made good choices, perhaps I made bad ones, but the truth of the matter is, its all a matter of perspective. I hate that I'm introverted, sometimes. But if I had been different in any way, I wouldn't have met the people I know today. I may not have the same wonderful friends I have now if I had a different personality.

But then again, if I had been more confident, maybe I would've talked to "her" already. Maybe "she" would've liked me. Maybe we could have been more than just mere strangers. Maybe...

Another day...

Another day just passed by today, same as any other day. The sad thing about it is that it happens everyday. Countless possibilities can happen in the span of a day. Opportunities and problems present themselves. But how come a day for me is just like any other day? I feel like I'm being cheated out of my days. Nothing seems to happen that makes a day memorable from all the other days I've lived through.

On to other things...
There is a certain emptiness that I feel every now and then. And as time goes by, it seems to get bigger and extend deeper into my soul. What's this all about? How come I feel empty? Is it loneliness? I don't know... It's eating me up inside and there's nothing i can do that I know of...

Quiz results...

You are the Moon card. Entering the Moon we enter
the intuitive and psychic realms. This is the
stuff dreams are made on. And like dreams the
imagery we find here may inspire us or torment
us. Understanding the moon requires looking
within. Our own bodily rhythms are echoed in
this luminary that circles the earth every
month and reflects the sun in its progress.
Listening to those rhythms may produce visions
and lead you towards insight. The Moon is a
force that has legends attached to it. It
carries with it both romance and insanity.
Moonlight reveals itself as an illusion and it
is only those willing to work with the force of
dreams that are able to withstand this
reflective light. Image from: Stevee Postman.
http://www.stevee.com/

Which Tarot Card Are You?

err.. ok.


You are naturally born with a gift, whether it be
poetry, writing or song. You love beauty and
creativity, and usually are highly intelligent.
Others view you as mysterious and dreamy, yet
also bold since you hold firm in your beliefs.

What Type of Soul Do You Have ?

Hmm, possible. Just not a girl.


You are Form 1, Goddess: The Creator.
"And The Goddess planted the acorn of life.
She cried a single tear and shed a single drop
of blood upon the earth where she buried it.
From her blood and tear, the acorn grew into
the world."
Some examples of the Goddess Form are Gaia (Greek),
Jehova (Christian), and Brahma (Indian).The Goddess is associated with the concept of
creation, the number 1, and the element of
earth.Her sign is the dawn sun.
As a member of Form 1, you are a charismatic
individual and people are drawn to you.
Although sometimes you may seem emotionally
distant, you are deeply in tune with other
people's feelings and have tremendous empathy.
Sometimes you have a tendency to neglect your
own self. Goddesses are the best friends to
have because they're always willing to help.

Which Mythological Form Are You?

Another girl?


You are Long-wang!
Mythological Background: Yes, the dragon represents
everything you think of when you think of a
dragon - fearsome and invincible. Also, it is
greatly respected just because of that fact.
The dragon has a very protective aspect to it.
Even Jupiter reminds you of intense smashing
power. The dragon is almost always surrounded
by rain-bearing clouds and fog; and the
appearance of its constellation always signals
rainfall and lightning. It's also a symbol of
authority worn by the nobility and the imperial
class. Japanese Name: Seiryuu.

Which Chinese Mythological Being Are You?

I like the dragon part but is it really me?

Burnout

In just a few short weeks, 1st sem will be over, and everything will be calm again. But before that happens, there's a gauntlet of tasks waiting to be finished. The deadlines are piling up faster than I can finish them and I'm beginning to feel the results. I'm getting burned out fast. I've put a lot of effort out already, but it seems that it was late as usual. How do I cope with all these? So many deadlines, so little time...

But that's not the only reason for this current state I'm in. Schoolwork is just part of it; although it would seem to be the only part. There are hidden factors that I can't quite grasp yet. There might be something to do with everything else. Hmm... let's see, there's definitely family-related causes, and there's also friends-related causes, emotion-related causes, weather-related causes (i guess), and some other causes too minor to place in a group on their own. The bottomline is that everything that's been happening in my life is a cause, though some cause more "burn" than others.

Will I ever get anything done? I can't answer that yet. I hope though. I'm in a downward spiral and I hope I don't take anyone along with me...

"Fate, it seems, is not without a sense of humour."

Life has never been easy. Holding on to everyday is quite difficult, especially if Fate is constantly screwing with events.
I tried something lately. I'd try to make a mental list of events that happen to me everyday and separate them into "good" and "bad" categories. And it seems that everytime something "good" happens, a "bad" event follows. From what I've gathered so far, "bad" events seem to outweigh the "good" ones. Or maybe I'm just to pessimistic...

Who am I?

I'm here. For whatever reasons you have for visiting my place, welcome. My name is Michael. Some call me by that name. I'm also known to others by other names. Some are just variations of Michael such as Mike, on rare instances people call me Mikey. I'm also called by weird names like Jare, Boss, CLB, PLB, or some other name I have no explanation for... As for who I am as a person, I leave that for you to decide.